Category Archives: Catie Curtis

Snap dragons not snap reactions

“Come on, come on, let yourself be happy
Come on, come on, the world can get you down
Take the weight off of your shoulders
No more bitter town, no more bitter town.”- Catie Curtis
Catie Curtis
Julia and I opened for Catie Curtis this past weekend near Boston. Catie is a genuine person who sings about strength through vulnerability and embracing the unknown. We were moved by her focused but gentle openness back stage as well as her relaxed sincerity and generous spirit on stage. 
While backstage, we met one of her friends who was trying to resolve an issue that had just come up.  She was managing a dear one’s Facebook account who has recently developed dementia. Something had been posted that day by this dear one without full cognizance. This   friend of Catie’s had taken the post down and was trying to reach someone who had taken offense with the post and had gone off on a huge rant against it in the comment section.
My mother likes to say, “To take offense is to give offense.” Catie’s friend reached the person who had been offended and -explained what was going on with the author of the post. This person thanked her; and even called her back later to say that this reaching out really helped her because she recognized that her snap reactions and judgements were getting in her way.
None of us ever really know what if fully going on with ourselves, let alone one another.
Last night, Julia read me an article by Ken Wilber called Integral Spirituality, which will be the subject for another stream, but I got excited that it had been posted last year because another friend had recently sent me an article called the Rise and Fall of Ken Wilber, which talked about Ken being a ground-breaking intellectual who had written over twenty highly influential books that pushed the boundaries of transpersonal psychology and philosophy. A few years back Ken Wilber had faced criticism, reacted badly and had retreated from public view. He had even developed a rare disease that kept him bed-ridden.  It seemed that he was done, disqualified. Yet here he was with an article that is offering something that will really benefit those who read it.
Ken Wilber
The wandering point I am getting to is that it is easy for us to judge and to even write each other off. This is especially tempting in an age where we believe we don’t have time to investigate, or think we are getting all the information we need to come to a lasting conclusion about people and things around us from a single news story, headline, or hearing someone else’s opinion.
As my friend Paul Kane likes to say, “The time to give up on somebody is never.”  That doesn’t mean you have to vote for them or rely on them for your personal safety or guidance or even take what they say without a pillar of salt; but with discernment,we can still see the value inherent within.
May your value guide you towards a lasting happiness you can share.